Skip to main content

How Five Simple Words Can Get You What You Want

Communication

How Five Simple Words Can Get You What You Want

Source: Janine Driver | TEDxHardingU

The One-Line Takeaway

The key to unlocking untapped potential is recognizing "wiggle words" (like "typically") as signs that a decision is not final, and using the word "because" to justify an exception.

Body language expert Janine Driver reveals that we often leave value on the table simply because we accept the first "no" we hear. She uses a brilliant metaphor involving a paper ketchup cup to explain how we can expand our potential.

4 Golden Insights

1. The Ketchup Cup Metaphor

Most people use those little paper ketchup cups folded up, holding only a small amount. But if you pull the folds open, they hold three times as much. Driver argues most people live life like the folded cup—using only a fraction of their potential. The goal is to identify the moments where you can "pull open the folds" to access the potential hidden in plain sight.

2. "Decided" is Not "Executed"

When a boss or partner says "we decided" (e.g., to not give you a raise), do not give up. "Decided" means the choice is in the reasoning stage—it is not an executed final action. There is still a chance to change the outcome by pushing the boundaries.

3. The Power of "Ly-Words"

Listen carefully for words ending in "ly": Typically, Normally, Usually.

These are "wiggle words." They signal a standard operating procedure, not a hard rule. They are a "2% open closet door" that you can push open to get what you want. If they say "We typically don't do that," they are admitting that sometimes, they do.

4. The Most Influential Word

The word "Because" is the tool that opens the "ketchup cup." It bridges the gap between the "wiggle word" and your desired result by providing a reason. It moves a decision from the reasoning stage to a new result.

"Before accepting a 'no,' ask yourself: 'If I don't fight for what I want right now, will this negatively affect someone else in my life?'"

— Janine Driver

🍟 Actionable Takeaway

Listen for the Wiggle: In your next conversation, listen intently for the words "decided," "typically," "usually," or "normally." Immediately follow up with a request for an exception using the word "because" to justify why you should be the special case.

#JanineDriver   #Negotiation   #Communication   #BodyLanguage   #Influence   #HowToGetWhatYouWant

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Stop Trying So Hard: Achieve More by Doing Less

Productivity Stop Trying So Hard: Achieve More by Doing Less Source: Bethany Butzer | TEDxUNYP The One-Line Takeaway We can achieve more while maintaining our health by shifting from "upstream effort" (struggle) to "downstream effort" (flow). Are you constantly exhausted, feeling like you are paddling against the current? I recently watched a powerful TEDx talk that challenges the modern obsession with "hustle culture." ❌ Upstream Effort Paddling fiercely against the current. Exhausting, unproductive, and leads to burnout. ✅ Downstream Effort Flowing with the current. You still row (effort), but you align with life's flow and enjoy the journey. 3 Key Insights ...

J Krishnamoorthi

 Main Points from the Biography Sadness is a global phenomenon and everlasting one. It need seperate and deep study Belief creates division. You isolate into a group either to protect from other group or to dominate over other group. Organised religions are rooted in divisive tendencies. All the holy texts leads you to blind beliefs and rituals. It's better to stay away from it. You can't learn anything from texts or others. You may get fact/technique but cannot learn truth and pleasure. Never ever believe in anything. You don't need to. You must not go behind power, position, money. There is no state as that of teacher and student. There is only information exchange. When you become universe, all the divisions (caste, religion, sex, nationality, organisation) will be destroyed. Always be alone, and always meditate. never meditate on god or symbols. it may lead you to hallucinations. just meditate on you. Any person who says they can give you supernatural experiences are fr...

Stop Doubting Yourself and Go After What You Really, Really Want

💖 Self-Doubt & Self-Love Stop Doubting Yourself and Go After What You Really, Really Want Source: Mario Lanzarotti  |  TEDxWilmington ❤️ The One-Line Takeaway Self-doubt is not a defect to eliminate, but a signal that we need more self-love—something we can respond to by sharing our doubts, accepting ourselves, and forgiving our past. In this heartfelt talk, Mario Lanzarotti reframes self-doubt in a radical way. Instead of seeing it as an enemy that must be destroyed, he presents it as a misunderstood friend—a voice that appears whenever our self-love tank is running low. Rather than chasing a fantasy of being “fearless,” this perspective invites a softer courage: to share our doubts, to stay connected ...